Friday 29 January 2010

Every gambler knows that the secret to survivin' is knowin' what to throw away and knowin' what to keep

For many years here the customer has been able to be wrong … it’s just the address that has changed slightly.

I must have been in this town longer than the journalist who wrote the following article, or he/she would have referred to times past. There was even an article in the very same newspaper within the last month; similar story but at least that customer mentioned that the food was good!

Before the site where the new multistory rises up from the street was prepared for the building which houses the restaurant Tramontana, there was a old Darwin house which housed the Mississippi Queen, a restaurant which was renowned for it’s good food and eccentric owner. He was not shy of chucking a fruity or, for that matter, a table full of plates if the customers did not meet his requirements. Locals knew the situation and the rules and behaved accordingly. You nearly always got a very good meal in quaint surroundings and sometime, an added floor, or table, show.

Legends were raised under the roof of the Mississippi Queen, and gained amplititude as stories were told and retold. What a pity, perhaps that was all before the time of YouTube. John Spellman was never a man afraid to make his view quite clear to anyone who happened by.

IT SEEMS Darwin has found its answer to Seinfeld's Soup Nazi. (link to news article)

The character in the hit '90s US sitcom was famous for the excessively strict regimentation he constantly demanded of his patrons.

And it seems John Spellman has adopted a similar "no soup for you" regime at his new Darwin restaurant.
A patron was less than impressed with their treatment on a recent visit to Spellman's Tramontana.
In a letter to the NT News the customer said the night was, "less than enjoyable but certainly memorable" then proceeded to detail the happenings.
Everything from having to share menus, slack service and "unbelievably rude" management was mentioned.
To add insult to injury, when the customer complained, the response was that it was "obviously not their type of restaurant". The manager then took a $10 note out of the register and told the customer to go "buy yourself a hamburger".
When ConfideNTial contacted Mr Spellman to hear his side of the debacle, he was surprisingly unapologetic. "They were very difficult customers to begin with," he said. "The party had originally booked for 30 people, and the night before confirmed only 16. That's $1000 lost in turnover - so, yes, I was cross to start with".
Throwing the old adage "the customer is always right" straight out the window, Mr Spellman said the group insisted on splitting the drinks bill and claimed they were charged for a champagne that was never received. The customer wrote a letter of complaint to Mr Spellman - he was going to reply, but "restrained himself".
"I have tamed my act," he said. "But I was tempted to send them a voucher for McDonalds, because that's where they should have been."
The unhappy patrons have vowed never to return.


I am saddened to advise them that they probably won’t be missed, and perhaps the old adage of “any advertising is good advertising” may work in this case and remind some of the old customers of the Mississippi Queen (who have been probably dining quietly for the last couple of years) that Spellman is back in business!

Thursday 28 January 2010

You have to know when to fold them

Sometimes you have to rebel against bureaucracy and sometimes it is just better to keep your mouth shut and just THINK the rebellion. It’s knowing the difference that is sometimes my problem. Sometimes the smart alec, fly by the seat of the pants girl in me just escapes. That girl nearly always gets into trouble! Yes, I know that with age comes maturity, doesn’t it? Well, not always I am sad to advise. Sometimes it is just too much of an opportunity left open, or you just get too peeved by the other person and you have to let fly. That often results in what I call an oops moment.

I am reminded of the words of the song The Boxer by Kenny Rogers:
You've got to know when to hold 'em
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away
Know when to run

My friend Lulu reminded me of this today when I read her blog.

Several years ago I was at the Blood Bank going through the interview before donating blood.

Himself had been a blood donor for ever and I decided that I should join the club.

I had already filled in the four page form and had made it to the interview. The interviewer goes through each question, asking some further questions every now and then to clarify the situation. No problems. Then we get to the section regarding overseas travel. I understand the reasons for the questions and had answered them accurately. It was at this stage that the interviewer first made the comment that I travelled a lot. Yes, I enjoyed travelling and did so as often as was possible I told her. But you really travel a lot. Yes, and I have listed on the form all the details. But that is really a lot of travel. Well, not really, but we enjoy travel. At this stage my voice was getting a little terse. I was ready to move on from this question, get to the donating bit and get back to work (so I could afford to travel again perhaps?). But no, she had got stuck in the groove, like an old vinyl record or a scratched CD.

That seat of the pants girl was ready for a few words. Somehow that time I kept quiet; and didn’t tell her that I needed to do a few drug courier runs every now and then to keep my hand in!

I think that would have resulted in one of those cryptic codes in the margin that I imagine immigration staff put on the immigration and customs form (when you arrive in the country) that gives the heads up to the next person which row you need to be cleared through. And my career as a blood donor would be over, before it started, or at the very least, postponed!

Interviewers, I know form generators put little boxes on forms for people to tick or cross or whatever; but YOUR JOB is to read them, and think outside the square, not get boxed in it yourself.

Saturday 23 January 2010

By Jove ... I think I've got it!

There has been so much time, money and frustration trying to work it out; but I think this is the best explanation.

Sunday 3 January 2010

Ahhh ... now where was I?

Listening to the news, it would appear that there may be a few people who could use this lady's help.


Sad, but true.